Co-Host: Shelley Jones
Singleness is not a disease, it’s an invitation. There are social stigmas and pressures for women to get married at a certain age, and if you don’t, you’ll be outcasted. That is a lie and nothing more. You are not less than. You are not disease-ridden. You are not unable to do God’s will. God will break down those lies if you press into His character.
You have to press into the invitation of God’s character to the point where it is accessing the walls and the fears of your heart. Let the Holy Spirit come in and heal those areas. Watch as pure hope begins to manifest in the areas previously occupied by hopelessness. And waiting doesn’t mean sitting back and twiddling your thumbs; waiting doesn’t mean resentfully sitting back and letting bitterness grow as time passes by; waiting for means pursuing Jesus and His heart for you.
Many times, when we are in a season of waiting, people will attempt to inspire and encourage us with optimism. They’ll say things like “It’ll happen!” Or “God told me you’d be married soon.” And when seasons of opportunity come and go without a hope fulfilled, it can leave you feeling more hopeless than before.
As someone receiving that well-intended optimism, it’s important to guard your heart so that you don’t grow bitter with reality if the season passes without the outcome you desired.
How can you combat hope deferred? You combat hope deferred with Hope. And who is Hope? Hope is Jesus. Don’t give up hope. It’s the most simple but most difficult thing to do during seasons of waiting. Hope forces you to say “God, You’re able. I put my trust in You.”
Practically, that looks like surrounding yourself with a community who will speak life into you and your purpose and learning the character of God. Reading The Gospels allows us to learn the character of Jesus; Jesus introduces us to the heart of The Father; The Father introduces us to His Spirit. And it’s in that place of identity that He reveals your most sincere worth.
When you find your emotions and feelings not coinciding with the freedom and hope of glory, you need to check your perspective. Pull back on glorifying your expectations and your limited reality to ask God for His eternal perspective. Without His eternal perspective- and with a tunnel-visioned perspective of your own reality- you are blind to the rest of the picture. Zoom out and let yourself see reality from Heaven.
An eternal perspective says, “You were born for such a time as this- there is no qualifier other than that you were born. You are born, you are alive again in Christ, and you have a purpose that is more than just what you are waiting for.”
Practice Gratitude. If you start to practice gratitude from the smallest to the grandest of things, hopelessness will be eradicated.
A constant temptation during a season of waiting it settling. Settling is a way of self-soothing. But keep your eyes on the eternal perspective. God wants to work the fruit of the spirit into your season of waiting so that when the season of fulfillment comes, His spirit and His way is your first response. Settling looks satisfying in the moment, but it’s not lasting and will hurt more than help.
When you’re in tune with the Holy Spirit, you’ll be able to recognize- and choose- between the settling and the promise. Know yourself and know your worth. If you don’t see yourself as worthy, then you are ignoring the fact that you are His child, that He has a plan for you, and that His plan is better than you could ever ask, dream or imagine- and that He’s the perfecter of life and our faith.