I've been thinking a lot about singleness lately. There's this construction sign that I drive by every night after work. It says, "Single lane ahead." Every time I see it I think, "Wow, thank you for the reminder. Like I needed another one. Single lane for life!" Haha, Here’s the deal: I'm almost 30 and have never had a boyfriend. To some that might sound crazy, to others that might sound totally normal and even relieving to know you're not alone. I've appreciated being single, but can't say I ever thrived at it-- that is until now. Within the last few years my outlook on life has taken new shape. I've come to realize: I like being single. I mean I really like it! And I don't say that because I don't have options- let's be real people, I know I'm cute ;) I mean I actually have the choice and I want to be single right now and I don't mean that arrogantly. I'm enjoying it now more than I ever have. Why? I don't think I can pinpoint it to just one thing, but a change I made in the last year was to stop expecting Mr.Right to make a dramatic entrance into my life. I decided to start pursuing adventure and truly start living! I learned to be so thankful for the opportunity to be alone! Yes, it IS an opportunity! This season will pass by and in a blink I will be living the life I only imagined. I know this because I am now living in the dreams of my teenage years.
This season is so beautiful and I'm thankful for it, but I've also had my low seasons where it seemed like every three months I was harboring a new heartbreak. Or even the seasons when you really are single by default, have no options and the only guys asking for your number are awkward teenagers who think you’re in their grade or old men who are way too confident for their own good! Needless to say, by the grace of God, I've come this far.
And so I want to encourage you: If you are single, truly BE single, with all that you are. Don't lose your head in the clouds about a future you COULD have. Instead, look at what you DO have! Connect with the relationships that are real. Meet people without a personal agenda, go places without trying to meet someone. Don't try to manipulate situations to try and be seen. Yet, on the other end, don't be passive. Go boldly and courageously after the dream in your heart! Pour your heart into friendships- give without return. Sacrifice and serve in secret. And when the right person comes along- fearlessly embrace the unknown and uncharted territory of commitment. Be free and recklessly abandon those alone years for a new life of togetherness.
Experience real love, the choice of it and the force by which nothing can stop it!
Dating and marriage will bring new joy and new challenges. But for now, we have the joy and challenges of singleness to behold. So, single girl/guy, pace yourself well in this moment. Enjoy it. Relish in it. Laugh hysterically. Make a fool of yourself- but don’t loose your dignity. Go on dates. Dance like a fool. Travel to places and earmark this season with priceless memories to fill the storybook of your life- stories that you will tell your children's children.
Amidst my joy, I am excited for the day when I will have a boyfriend and don't have to awkwardly ask 14 different people and offer my first born child to arrange a ride to the airport, or have that content-in-singleness talk AGAIN with that girl that found her “perfect match”. I know soon enough that day will come. But for now, I’ll enjoy the cringe worthy drive to LAX. I'll have that awkward talk a thousand times and even smile and nod my head because in this moment, right now, this very second, I'm smiling not because I know one day my prince will come, but because I am living the adventure of this season- I am single and I like it!